Anger is an emotion of enmity toward something or someone that has deliberately done wrong to you.
We often face a situation where we go through a situation that makes us angry. It can be good as well as a bad thing.
It can be good in a way that can help us make a decision. Due to anger, we are able to recognize which situation we feel good in and which we want to avoid. It also makes the other person aware of the fact that a certain thing by them is not acceptable for you. It can help you get rid of your negative emotions by letting them a way out. At last, it can help you in self-awareness and protection.
However, an excess of anger can have drastic effects. Even more than its benefits, it can be harmful. How? Anger is harmful as it can lead to aggression. Anger is just an emotion while aggression is the step taken due to anger. While we are angry, we lose our mind and this makes us perform an action which we might regret later. In fact, you might have a number of incidents from your life where you lost your mind, and maybe you still regret it.
Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.Buddha
To get over this and for the sake of our mental health, we must learn how to control our anger and keep calm in any such situation. Let’s have a look on these 5 simple ways:
1. Move away from the source:
First of all, recognize the source of your anger. Move away from the situational place and try to distract your mind from the thing which caused you anger. Change your environment immediately. Take a brief time out. Preferably go to a place which is calm and out of noise and rush.
If the anger is caused by a person then take a step back. Avoid the person who caused you the pain. If you know that the anger will vanish soon keep yourself away until then. However, if the pain is big enough then choose to stay apart until and unless you overcome it completely. Because the thing which caused you pain and anger will provoke more anger and hatred. If you have severe anger issues you might react to them in a serious way which you might regret later on.
2. Practice self-relaxation techniques:
Whenever you get into an angry situation, try to keep yourself calm. It will help you get rid of your anger soon and have a broad overlook of the situation again. You can practice following calming exercises soon after you feel an anger attack:
- Take deep breaths
- Sit down if you are standing or lie down if sitting already.
- Have a glass of water.
- Get a massage.
- Go for meditation or yoga.
- Undergo music and art therapy.
- Have aromatherapy.
These relaxation exercises will help you to get over your nerves and to cool your anger. However, to get over this feeling in the long term, do daily exercises. It has been proven by a survey that people who do daily exercise are more capable of getting over their anger than those who don’t.
3. Find workable solutions.
In some situations, you cannot escape the place or person. Rather you have to face them even when you are angry. In that case, you have to find a workable solution to the problem. Remind yourself that your anger will not solve the problem. However, it might lead you to even more and bigger problems. Try to overcome the loss or pain that caused your anger. Calmly think upon the situation. Show empathy and get over the feeling.
Anybody can become angry – that is easy, but to be angry with the right person and to the right degree and at the right time and for the right purpose, and in the right way – that is not within everybody’s power and is not easy.Aristotle
4. Don’t hold grudges.
Sometimes, we feel so bad about a situation that our mind doesn’t escapes that. We start hating a person for their action or behavior. In this case, we naturally build a behavior of unforgiveness and hatred towards them. This might seem normal at times. But this is as drastic as your thinking. It can lead you to more and even severe anger issues in future. Treat every person equally. Don’t let the grudges develop inside of you.
Own your anger. Know that it can be your mistake at times and not always the other person’s. This will save you from having disastrous effects of anger on you later.
Practice forgiveness. Forgive the person knowing that he/she is a human as well. Everyone can be wrong at times. Don’t lose empathetic behavior.
5. Find a way of Catharsis:
Catharsis is a very easy and simple way to let your negative feelings escape. It makes a way out for them and brings peace to you. This can save you from aggressive and intense purging out of your anger. There are many ways of catharsis you can practice in order to release your anger.
- Talk to a close friend
- Express yourself through writing journal
- Talk to a pet or cartoon (this might sound funny but is really effective)
- Act out on inanimate objects
- Make some noise or shout
- Use a stress-relief tool
Extreme anger can have a very disastrous effect on health. It can cause headache, digestion problems such as abdominal pain, insomnia, increased anxiety, depression, high blood pressure, skin problems such as eczema and even heart attack.
Remember when Einstein said:
“Anger dwells only in the bosom of fools.”
If you have anger management issues, it is really important for you to overcome them. Use the above techniques and live a sound and healthy life.
Another great read just for you: 8 Life Lessons You Need to Learn Before Turning 25