“A man is Known by the company he keeps”
Ever heard this sentence somewhere? You definitely would have. So what’s your stance on it? Your answer will be either ‘YES’ or ‘NO’.
If your answer was YES then Great! But if you chose NO, then grab a cup of coffee, sit back and read this interesting article mindfully because you might change your mind after this!
Kinds Of People You Should Avoid:
No matter how much you try not to get affected by the people around you. Eventually, you end up either adopting any of their habits or wasting your own energy on them.
Sometimes we really keep some people so close to our heart that it really becomes difficult for us to avoid them or cut off our relationship with them. However, there comes a point where you have to make a choice between choosing between the two. Who is better to stay in your life and who you need to avoid for your own better growth.
1. Showy people
Showy people pretend to appear better than others. They present themselves in a way to attract people around them. A sad fact about them is that they already know they have less worth. So to get their desired attention and affection, they pretend who they actually are not. They do all of this to prove themselves worthy.
Being around showy people means they are going to brag about themselves most of the time. All they will do is to present themselves as a better person than others. You may try not to let not their behavior affect you. But you might end up feeling low about yourself! They can make you feel bad for being yourself. And you will observe them always finding ways to prove that they are more dignitary than anyone else.
2. People who don’t learn from their mistakes
Everyone in the world does mistakes. We fall, we get up, we recover and hence we learn. But the people being discussed here are those who fall into the same trap again and again. You can not help this kind of people. In fact, they become a threat to your own self as well.
It is because of their sanctimonious behavior which tells them that they are always right. Because of their high ego, they keep on repeating the same mistakes again and again. Hence, they learn nothing. Apart from this, they affect people around them too with this “All is well” behavior.
3. People who are comfortable in their lower state
Being satisfied with what you have is a good thing. But never trying to achieve better in life and showing laziness to it is not. You might have noticed in your life that if you are in the company of someone who is constantly trying and always doing something to bring a better change in life, they drive you as well. You also become concerned about yourself and your future when you are with them which is a pretty good thing to an extent. They are like your personal motivational speakers.
However, if you are with someone who is mindful of their lower state, but stay comfortable in it. Moreover, they are doing nothing to make their life better. These kinds of people demotivate you from your goals. As They portray that life is to be lived either way and there is no need to make effort for it.
4. People who are freeloaders
A freeloader is someone who takes advantage of your liberality and gives you nothing in return.
You would have encountered some people in your life who are always careful if you spend more. They try to return your favors in a good way and they really appreciate it if you are being good towards them. They feel treasured by your presence in their life and try to return the good in a well-behaved manner as well.
On the contrary, there are some people who are freeloaders. They are always poverty-stricken. It is not a bad thing to help out your friend when they are going through some hard point in life. But the problem arises when they are doing no effort to come out of this state and always present there with an extended hand. They get all the favors from you but never keep it in their mind. You must know that it is not your duty to pay off someone’s bills or help them out in various things. If you do so, you are doing a favor and they must know they have to pay back.
5. People who are lazy
Have you ever been with someone who is really lazy? Like you people be sitting there for an hour and then you ask for a walk. But they refuse because they are too lazy for it? Aye, we have all been there right! Supposedly you are not one of those! Haha, jokes apart but let’s get deep into it.
Consider laziness as a disease. And not just a disease, a highly infectious disease. Lazy people can make a highly perky man into a torpid one. The more you are around a sluggish man less are your chances to move and get your work done. You can notice by time how much your productivity has declined.
Instead, if you are with someone who is quick and energetic, you can feel that vibes and it will make you more of a healthy moving person. So you must start being less with those lazy people or you will see yourself as one of them in the future.
6. People who talk big and do nothing
So there are always some people around you who are always ranting about how they are going to manage things. As if they are going to announce some big news soon or getting their success story written. But after some days or maybe months, when you meet them they haven’t even started working on any of that. Such people can just talk but getting things done is not what they are good at.
These kinds of people who spend the most of time talking big and very little time doing that are someone you surely need to avoid. In the end, these people are only left with words and no progress can be seen. If you have something you need to get done from them, they will talk as if they can do it in minutes. They also might satisfy you with your work but they get very little of that done and it might ruin your work quality as well.
7. People who are always depressed
Then come these people who always seem as if they are done with life. They are always talking about something bad in life and never seem to be content or happy with what they have got.
Supporting your friend who is going through some bad events in life is important. But one should also know that life wholly is not bad. There are some good chapters too. Dark times where one may feel like giving up come in everyone’s life, but keeping your morale high and working out on things also make it better. However, if someone is always showing complaining behavior and also not doing anything to get better is not someone you should be spending most of your time with. Such people are mostly radiating negative energy which can affect you as well.
8. People who always live in a state of self-pity
It is only a step from boredom to disillusionment, which leads naturally to self-pity, which in turn ends in chaos. -Manly Hall
People suffering from self-pity are looking out for someone who will show compassion to them. Someone who will listen to all their sad story and exclaim that how difficult life they have got. Even if someone tries to tell them that things will get better soon. They are not ready to listen. Because in actual they don’t want to believe in it.
Self-pity is a kind of drug. It makes one feel less bad about themselves for the condition they are in. Such people complain about how unfair life has been to them. With this behavior of them, they can have a big influence on you. Being with someone who is not ready to accept their mistake because all they want to blame is circumstances can be lethal.
9. People who don’t dream
People who don’t dream don’t live.
A man who wants to succeed in life dreams about it first. He has clear life goals. His vivid dreams push him towards achieving his goals. Having a dream means having a goal. You know what you want to achieve, you dream it, you work on it and you finally make your way to it. The problem comes when a person refuses to dream.
A non-dreamer is content where ever he is, he is not ready for growth. Maybe he is too lazy to work for something so he just stops thinking or dreaming about that. He might lead you to think this way too. He won’t dream, nor will allow you to dream. Even if he can not do this, he will always be finding ways to prove that your dreams are just ‘dreams’ and are not achievable.
10. People who don’t believe
Even people who don’t dream do not have this much deleterious effect on you as people who don’t believe. These are those who have dreams and they do fantasize about a better brighter future. But, they keep their dreams just a fantasy. They don’t believe they can turn any of this into reality. This means they don’t believe in themselves and in the power of determination and hard work. They not only come out to be a failure themselves but also affect people around them. Instead of talking about hope, all they talk about is the gloomy dark side of the world. Their negative thinking not only affects their own mental capacity to succeed but those around them too.
You might have been around someone who is always talking about how bad the condition of investment and profits in new businesses has gone. Or maybe how bad the condition of the country’s politics has gone. They always find the bad in all good and then rant that the bad will go worst. They don’t hope for good and don’t believe in any good change. In this way, they change the minds of their fellows too. This provokes uncertainty and dis-believe in others around them as well. If YES then you must start avoiding them, or they will take the spark of improvement out of you. Because if one does not believes in himself, how are they going to make you believe in yourself?
11. Ungrateful ones
As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them.
Being grateful is a part of faith. There are people who are not grateful to others around them who have helped them achieve a goal. Then there are some who are even ungrateful to God. Being with them you always feel like you owe them a favor. Sometimes, even if you put the effort into doing their work all by your heart, they pick apart and criticize. Instead of being thankful to you, they doubt your intention of good for them. They are so surrounded by their own self that you and your efforts matter nothing for them. They might make you feel like it was your duty to help them out instead of taking it as a favor.
Ungrateful people never feel content. They are always dissatisfied with their life achievements no matter how far they have gone. A famous saying says that “If you are not grateful to mankind, you can not be grateful to God”.
By unkind, I mean people who don’t show sympathy. These kinds of people are always there to judge you. They are always reacting to your behaviors and actions negatively. The reason, why people are unkind, is because they have lived a very easy life or they have been through so much bad in their life.
People who have lived easy life think it is the same for all. They take everything light and fail to acknowledge your problems. They think everything is achievable and hence never know how it is like to walk in your shoe. Similarly, someone who is been through so much bad in life thinks it’s only they who have suffered and they fail to understand your condition. They cover it up by saying that if no one has been good towards them, then why should they be.
Why Avoid Negative People?
Most of the time, we think that if the other person has some bad habit, you can change them by your influence. But again, you end up adopting their habits. Being around such kinds of people can drain your energy.
We all know that the vibes from some people can affect you. The effect can be positive as well as negative. According to spiritual beliefs, there is an aura of each person. These auras exist in different sizes and different intensities. You might have felt that after meeting some people your energy level goes up. You feel more motivated and close to your goal. However, some people are just energy draining. These auras define one’s personality and effect they are going to have on others.
How to Deal with such people?
You can completely cut off with people who are not useful to you. This is NOT selfish, it is just an act of self-care. And we must know that we can only be helping others if our own wellbeing is good. Doing things for your wellbeing is not an egocentric thing!
However, sometimes these toxic traits come out to be in someone you cannot completely cut off with. Such as, you have to deal with your boss anyway, you cannot just leave your job and move away just because he is giving you bad vibes. Moreover, many people report about their toxic parents and siblings. With such a close relation, you cannot get yourself separated and move on. The best you can do is to find ways how to not let that negativity invade your life and decisions.
These are a few things to practice when avoiding negative people:
Try to avoid interaction with someone you don’t like to as much as possible. Whenever the meeting is not necessary and you see any such person in public, just move away.
Never make yourself available to get in conversation with such people. Keep on doing your work if you meet them or at least pretend.
Be with people who lift you up-
Find new people or make your bond stronger with those your energy matches with. Once you start socializing with positive people, less you will find reasons to be with the toxic ones.
Hang out in groups-
In a group, there are a number of energies around. The positive comments of someone can help you overcome the negative reactions of others.
Don’t get involved in an argument with them-
Whenever a heated conversation starts with someone like this, keep your mouth shut. You should only be speaking where you are heard and understood. If you think your words can have no effect on someone, it’s better to be quiet then.
Block the person on social media-
It often happens that someone’s posts trigger sadness in you. Scrolling through your newsfeed you might have observed changes in your emotional state when some relating post comes through. So if someone is constantly posting stuff not matching your energy, unfriend or block that person.
Remember that you don’t owe them an explanation-
You don’t need an emotional reaction to everything you come across. You have to keep the individuality of your life. Tell that you don’t need to give an explanation to anyone except yourself.
Avoid people who deviate you from your goals and give you self doubt. Your energy and self-care is important!